Note to self: do not attempt to run after eating a large breakfast!!
Ugh! It was awful this morning!! Every single time I ran, I had these horrible cramps and my breakfast was right there the whole time. I did wait an hour before heading outside, but I guess the waffle + greek yogurt + nut butter combo is just too much for a pre-run breakfast. Now I know!
I’m trying desperately not to get discouraged by my inability to run since John died. I feel like I have lost every ounce of endurance I ever had and physically, I just cannot do it yet! This morning, despite the cramping issue, I did manage 3.25 miles but I ended up having to walk most of the time and finishing in an embarrassingly horrific time of 40 minutes!!! 40 minutes! Good news is that my shins felt fine and I think I could be better if I ran on an empty stomach….I’m going to try again this weekend but right now am just feeling pretty down on myself about it.
After my run I was in a rush to shower and get out the door because I had an annual doctor’s appointment check up this morning. On my way out, I still was feeling pretty bloated and gaggy, but I grabbed one of the dried fruit bars that Chrissy sent me yesterday to munch along the way!
I love you, Chrissy!!!! This bar was AMAZING! I loved how thick it was, most of all. I really, really, really wish we had a Trader Joe’s around here because this was the best fruit bar I’ve ever had.
I got to the doctor’s office and had to sit in the waiting room for 50 minutes! Don’t you hate that??! Hunger hit me like a punch in the stomach all of the sudden and I reached for the other half of my delicious “grawnola bar” from One Lucky Duck–—
I can’t even express how awesome these bars are. SO chewy and dense with a chewy sweetness from the dried blueberries. I love ’em!
My appointment went fine but I was shocked to see that I had lost 7 lbs since the last time I had weighed myself. Of course we all know how much I EAT so that’s not the problem—I think its just the stress of my brother dying and everything in between. Weird.
Needless to say, I was starving my pants off when I got home so I threw together a simple and delicious wrap for lunch:
I used 2 spoonfuls Sabra’s garlic hummus (aka crack), 2 slices boar’s head turkey, 1 ounce fresh goat cheese and a ton of spinach, all on an Ezekiel sprouted wrap. It was divinely messy!
I’m here writing for the rest of the afternoon…that is, until 3:30 when I go with my parents to grief counseling. Fun times I tell you. Fun times. I wanted to go to a yoga class this evening but I don’t think my wrist would like that very much (all those side balances and chatarungas) so I’m just going to lay low.
Enjoy your day!
ps—
Does ANYONE have an extra BlogHer 2009 ticket that they don’t want? I am desperately looking for a ticket but can’t find one anywhere. I would love it if someone could help me out! 🙂
kelly T
May 7, 2009 at 10:53 amaw jenna, don’t beat yourself up about running. you’ll get your groove back, i have no doubt. in the meantime make sure you nourish yourself! keep eating great food that makes you feel healthy and sound.
Sarah (lovINmytummy)
May 7, 2009 at 10:57 amI can’t imagine even attempting to run with new, big, throbbing tat on my arm! Self-care is the most important thing for you right now, and I think I’d not just be “phoning in” workouts, but life in general. You’ll get your groove back in time!
sammy
May 7, 2009 at 10:58 amI think it is so good to go to grief counselling for you all. You may not feel like you are ready,and you may feel even more empty after it as if it didn’t “help” in any way,but in the long run it will be a positive step for your family to face this tragedy head on together with outside help.
I would advise you to also get some one on one counselling at some point too,where you may feel you can be even more open about your grief and not trying to protect your parents in any way from hearing about your angst.
Anyways,this is just my two cents worth,but I admire you all for starting that so soon.
My very deepest sympathy and thinking of all of
your brother’s school buddies too.I hope they aren’t keeping it too bottled up.
Michelle @ Find Your Balance
May 7, 2009 at 11:01 amAw, don’t beat yourself up. 40 minutes of activity is admirable, whether it’s running or walking or whatever. You have been through a lot. (And when you do go to yoga, make sure your teacher knows if your wrist is bothering you. I give students modifications and sometimes props to help. Don’t want to mess with those wrists–you only get 2!)
polly
May 7, 2009 at 11:03 amoh honey, no worries! You will get your endurance back soon and you taking time for your wrists and your heart to heal… all good things. xoox
I love when you say you were starving your pants off. that makes me laugh. I HATE to be starving my pants off or on! 😉 hehe
Paige
May 7, 2009 at 11:05 amI was very upset about something a few months ago, and felt like I could not run because of it. What I did was ditch my Garmin for about a week and ran without timing anything. I ran to feel the breeze, and just to soak up my surroundings. It helped clear my head and enjoy the “release” of running…and I didn’t have to worry about how slow I was, or if I had to stop and walk.
Rachel
May 7, 2009 at 11:07 amI’m sorry you didn’t have a good run. The endurance will come back in no time. It’s amazing what stress can do to your body.
Emily
May 7, 2009 at 11:08 amTry not to get too down about your run this morning – even when I’m running 5-6 days a week I’ll have bad runs where I just feel like I have no endurance – everyone does! Don’t rush yourself and you’ll get back into it for sure. 🙂
life coach jen
May 7, 2009 at 11:13 amYou’ll get your running groove back, don’t spend too much time being down on yourself about it! When you go to bed at night, picture how wonderful it will feel to get that endurance back, how strong you are, how much you love running…it will show up sometime!
Lacey
May 7, 2009 at 11:13 amYou will get back to running like you used too. You have been through a lot lately and things take time. Dont be hard on yourself you are doing really well!
brandi
May 7, 2009 at 11:19 amdon’t worry too much about the running – you’ll be back in your groove in no time 🙂 I wouldn’t knock 40 minutes either – many people would be PSYCHED to do over 3 miles in that time.
Something is always better than nothing!
I hope you have a great afternoon!
Beadie
May 7, 2009 at 11:20 amSorry about the run 🙁 You will get your endurance back!
Colleen
May 7, 2009 at 11:21 amRunning can be like that sometimes…and I know how awful it feels to run on a full stomach, I did that last week and I felt like I just couldn’t catch my breath – I felt like a new runner! The next run I had was fine, but I made sure all the songs on my ipod kept me at a slower pace, and it felt wonderful! And don’t get down on yourself about the time…there are many out there who would LOVE to go 3.25 miles in 40 minutes. Keep things in perspective and take gentle care of yourself. Much love to you!
runeatrepeat
May 7, 2009 at 11:22 amDon’t feel bad about your run. It happens to the most seasoned runner. I’m sure training with TnT and having other people to run with is really going to help you too!
Heather
May 7, 2009 at 11:23 amHi Jenna!
I’m sorry to hear about your crappy run. But look at it this way: you DID 3.25 miles and you didn’t give up and quit and go back inside. That’s an accomplishment in and of itself! I had a difficult run yesterday of 3 miles too…I’ve been battling some nasty allergies! But I didn’t give up either…and that made me feel so good about myself!
Have a good counseling session and I’ll see you next blog post!
Love,
Heather
Matt
May 7, 2009 at 11:23 amSorry about the run. Your endurance will come back in time; don’t get discouraged!
Hallie
May 7, 2009 at 11:24 amGood for you for getting out there at all! I know you’ll get back into it and probably be stronger than ever before. Your time was like, a normal time for me, but I’m bigger than you are and new-ish to running…but I still get down on myself for being so slow. Just take it one day and one run at a time (at least that’s what I tell myself!).
Jen
May 7, 2009 at 11:30 amAww, don’t be so hard on yourself, Jenna. It’ll take a while for your crazy former endurance to come back in full force. Take it a little at a time, you know?
Good luck with the writing this afternoon! Hope those creative juices are flowing! <3
Jennifer
May 7, 2009 at 11:36 amSorry about your run! I am sure you will get back into the groove soon. I admire your family for going through grief counseling. It can be very beneficial and not a lot of people have to courage to go.
Danielle
May 7, 2009 at 11:39 amSorry about your run this mornings, perhaps after grief counseling you’ll feel much lighter and be able to get back into the groove.
Take your time and listen to your body. It’s been through a lot.
Jess
May 7, 2009 at 11:40 amI run on an empty stomach for all but my very longest runs and definitely suggest that you do too if food bothers you. Some people think that you “must” eat before running, but you should be fine on runs less than an hour.
blueberrybabe
May 7, 2009 at 11:41 amHas anyone ever made a meal, taken a bite, and then decided that is not at all what you wanted and made something completely different? that is what i did today at lunch. made a turkey sandwich, ate a bite, and decided to have almond butter and jelly instead. i feel kind of guilty about it! sometimes i eat things because i think “i should” but i really want something else!
janetha
May 7, 2009 at 11:43 ami am sure you will be back up to your normal pace soon enough. i mean, when tragedy strikes you can’t expect to be 100%. it is really impressive that you have been running at all, in my opinion. you have great focus and determination. and that wrap looks amazzzing, all of my favorite ingredients.
Julie
May 7, 2009 at 11:46 amI wanted to pass along a suggestion on the “runners block”: a few weeks ago I was dealing with some life difficulties and it was taking an unproductive toll on my running. I had a total loss of confidence in myself and mid-run I would tell myself I was struggling (i.e. “I can’t do this!” or “I’ll never make it!” or “I’ve gotta walk!!”) on distances that should have been easy for me. I was getting really worked-up about it, which was making the other things I was dealing with worse. A friend suggested getting a mystery/thriller book on cd from the library. I put a James Patterson novel on my iPod and it worked like a charm. I was able to “get out of my head” and focus on the engrossing plot of the novel. I haven’t had any “mental” obstacles since then and being able to run has helped me with the other things going on in my life.
melissa
May 7, 2009 at 11:47 am40 minutes isn’t that bad, especially if you walked some of it. Great wrap. hang in there girlie
Moran (The Running Addict)
May 7, 2009 at 11:47 amAww Jenna, I am sorry about these hard times. Don’t get too worked up over the runs; it will be fine!
Yes, I cannot imagine eating such a large breakfast and attempting to run an hour later! At least you’ll know not to do it again!
Fitzalan
May 7, 2009 at 11:51 amYour running will come back. You have so much going on in life right now that this is your body’s way of saying no, you can’t push me any futher…we got to take it slow together.
Hope the wrist is feeling better!
Happiness Awaits
Mara @ What's For Dinner?
May 7, 2009 at 11:59 amYou’ll get it back!!! Just keep on keepin’ on 🙂
Melissa
May 7, 2009 at 12:00 pmHey Jenna, that waffle combo looks divine, except not pre-workout 🙂 Sorry for the tummy trubs. Ease your way into running … your body is going through so much internally right now, stress-wise … but you’re doing as much as you can and should be proud of that. Smiling in the face of adversity; plugging along as best you can.
Shannon (The Daily Balance)
May 7, 2009 at 12:04 pmdon’t be so hard on yourself about running, you’ll get your endurance back — you’ve certainly had a couple of ROUGH weeks!
your wrap looks delish!
take care of yourself, Jenna! 😉
Lauren
May 7, 2009 at 12:16 pmJenna, you are MUCH TOO hard on yourself! For goodness sakes darling, you just lost your brother. Give yourself sometime sweetheart! The last thing you need right now is added stress about exercise. Exercise should be enjoyable, and when it isn’t we need to look at what we’re telling ourselves about it. The most important thing right now is to take care of YOURSELF and make sure you are eating enough. Treat yourself to something…a massage, something that can help you relax. Still sending my love and prayers along to you. xoxo
Jenna
May 7, 2009 at 12:27 pmJenna don’t get discouraged. I’m sure you were both mentally and physically put into shock with the loss of your brother. Healing takes time! We all know you will be back to your strong self in not time! take care!
K
May 7, 2009 at 12:41 pmHang in there, Jenna! You’ll be back running in no time! I hate waiting at the doctor’s office, it’s always cold and just gross!
Ann
May 7, 2009 at 12:55 pmI can totally relate on having bad runs, especially after eating. I find I have to be in that perfect zone of not hungry and not full to have a good cramp-free run. Everyone has off days (and weeks), but it’s great that you’ve been exercising daily and you’ll get back in the groove in no time.
Sarah M
May 7, 2009 at 1:00 pmOh Jenna, please don’t feel bad about running 3 miles in 40 minutes. First of all, you walked a lot of it, so the time doesn’t mean anything and it’s admirable that you are even able to get out of the house! And you haven’t really lost your endurance, you are probably just so emotionally drained that your body can’t give it 100%. Rest, do yoga, be kind to yourself. 🙂
Jennifer
May 7, 2009 at 1:04 pmHey, it’s better than my 60-min, 3-mile jogs/walks:)
Melissa @ For the Love of Health
May 7, 2009 at 1:07 pmOh man- I can only imagine how much that run hurt! I need to wait at least 3 hours after a big meal as my tummy is super-sensitive! Good for you for pressing on. You will definitely have a better run next time! At least now you know you have to wait a little longer.
I wish Trader Joe’s was in Canada! Based on everyone’s blogs, the food from there is great! 🙂
Havea great afternoon/evening!
What is BlogHer?
katie s
May 7, 2009 at 1:11 pmJenna, don’t worry about it!!! You have already been so inspirational to us all, gone through so much and been so active and outgoing! Give yourself a break, girl!!! Take it one day at a time and do not worry!
KB
May 7, 2009 at 1:14 pmI know what it feels like to go out on a run after time off…and i also know how it feels to run on a full stomach–>yikesss!
Don’t beat yourself up about it! Running takes time, and once you get back to doing it more often, it’ll feel good again 🙂
With that said, I’m off to go for a run of my own!
Anais
May 7, 2009 at 1:14 pmRunning will come back in time 🙂 Maybe try going with Ryan? For completely different reasons I was also in a running rut, and somehow heading out on a job with my bf brought my running endurance back (weird I know).
KB
May 7, 2009 at 1:15 pmOhh anddd a bit of advice-don’t worry about how fast you’re going when you’re not really feeling great-just be proud that you’re out there and relax 🙂
Laura S
May 7, 2009 at 1:17 pmJenna
Sorry to here about the run, you will get back into it!! Try not to eat yogurt before you run that always makes me have side cramps or I can feel my stomach turning when I run!
Amisha
May 7, 2009 at 1:23 pmIt has something to do with the amount of protein in the greek yogurt that makes me feel sick too if I try to run withint 2 hours of eating it! Even after only a snack of greek yogurt with something else I feel sick. It is just very slow processing. I’m sure if you only ate a light breakfast and ate the rest of it after your run you’d have done much better. Don’t worry! I’m a running fanatic and the same thing happens to me too. It has nothing to do with my endurance.
Run Sarah
May 7, 2009 at 1:28 pm40 minutes isn’t bad at all – I’m sure your endurance will come back with no time. I always get cramps if I run after eating too, it’s the worst.
justrun
May 7, 2009 at 1:52 pmGetting back into running slowly is okay. Try to give yourself a break and be proud that you’re tackling running at a time when it can be so hard to remember to take care of yourself. From someone that runs almost that slow all the time, you’re doing wonderfully.
Michelle Hisae
May 7, 2009 at 1:54 pmDamn girl, 7 pounds! It sucks that it was stress that did that. You look great!!!
Katherine
May 7, 2009 at 2:18 pmSo true that many people would LOVE to run 3.25 miles in 40 minutes! Don’t be so hard on yourself! The fact that you are able to get up in the morning, have a wonderful breakfast and get out the door is enough.
I truly admire your strength.
Also don’t stress about the weight loss, esp. since stress caused it 🙂 Enjoy writing.
xoxo
Mindy
May 7, 2009 at 2:27 pmI’ve always had a hard time figuring out a good pre-workout snack/meal! I hate getting cramps mid-run 🙁
Alison
May 7, 2009 at 2:40 pmYou know what the weird thing is about running? I am not a competitive runner at all, its something I do every now and then just when the weather is great and I feel like it. So I always think its funny that some times I can have skipped a week or two of running, but get out there and basically sprint 3 miles. Then, there are days when from the moment I hit the pavement, I just cannot get into it… at all. Those days always frustrate me, but I try to turn my then-walk into a mental break… I don’t know – I guess I just can’t run if I am not really feeling it… maybe its my body’s way of saying not today!
Allie Katie
May 7, 2009 at 2:50 pmDon’t worry at ALL about having a bad day of running. Or a bad week, or month. Running is the best because it is always there–and one good day will turn it all around.
xoox
AK
Samantha
May 7, 2009 at 3:03 pmHang in there, the running will get better. Everyone has rough ones! And there are a lot of people that would love to be able to go that distance, even if run walking. But I know how frustrating it is to not go your regular pace. (I’ve lost a minute off my pace and all my endurance since moving, so I gave up running)
The wrap looks amazing and those TJ fruit strips ROCK! My kids love them!
Lauren
May 7, 2009 at 3:05 pmI agree with all the great advice you got about your lackluster run. So many factors influence your run–your mental state, whether you’ve just eaten, etc. Don’t worry about it! You tried your hardest and are faring SO well in the face of adversity.
I’ve coming off a fairly serious IT band injury, and as a result, am not able to run my usual distances without tremendous pain. So, I’ve had to content myself with 3-4 mile runs, supplemented with spinning and yoga. Initially, I felt horrible during these runs; I kept telling myself that I *should* be doing more. Then I realized how stupid I was being about this issue. I have an injury that will only get worse if I don’t listen to my body and scale back on my running when I’m feeling pain. You HAVE to give yourself a much-needed break sometimes. There will always be a good, rewarding, empowering run waiting right around the corner for you!
Kimberly
May 7, 2009 at 3:19 pmThe weather couldn’t have helped your run much, either! It must have been almost 90 already by the time you headed out — that would be tough for anybody! Between the humidity, emotional exhaustion, and full tummy, you should chalk this one up to a fluke, for sure.
Kristilyn (The Food Journey)
May 7, 2009 at 3:27 pmYour sandwich looks so good! I recently found out the wonders of goat cheese and hummus (also with turkey and spinach). It’s delicious. In fact, part of me now wants to bring that for lunch tomorrow!
I had to laugh at your running time because I AM that slow! I do 3.1 miles every morning (sometimes more, sometimes less) and get it done anywhere from 30 to 35 minutes. I just can’t run fast that early and I find I have to have something in my stomach, so I usually eat half of a Lara bar or some kind of equivalent. And I have to have plenty of water, even if it’s a short distance like that.
I hope you can get your stamina back! Oh, and that’s awesome that you’re so prepared when you’re out … I must bring something in my purse the next time I have a long day!
K
Kath
May 7, 2009 at 3:51 pmI went to an annual doctor’s appointment today too 😉
Linda
May 7, 2009 at 3:55 pmI’m one of those people that would love to run 3 miles in 40 minutes. Right now I have too many back and knee problems to think about running! The nearest Trader Joe’s is about an hour from where I live, but soon I’ll be driving by it once a week. I’m so excited to check it out, I haven’t been there yet! I definately plan on finding those fruit bars!
Ali
May 7, 2009 at 3:56 pmI generally believe that I have a stomach of steel, but dairy is something I stay clear of before running!
emily
May 7, 2009 at 4:33 pmI’m a little late, but the tattoo looks great! Good for you for getting out there and running at all.
Fit Mommy
May 7, 2009 at 6:06 pmGeneral rules on running is no food 3 hours prior- for that burping gassy issue you had today. It’s ok if you’re motivation isn’t there. Find something that you love to do and do that. It might not be running right now.
Tracy
May 7, 2009 at 6:15 pmDon’t feel bad Jenna! I could never run just one hour after that kind of breakfast! It probably had too much fat/protein which is great for slower digestion, but not so good for pre-workout! Next time try a higher carb to protein ratio and less fat so you can get quick energry and then finish your breakfast after your run. That may work better for ya!! Good luck!
Alison
May 7, 2009 at 6:43 pmI seem to be the only person who can eat a big meal and run immediately afterward. My husband can’t eat anything within a few hours of running. When I’m on long runs, I need to have big meals beforehand. The only time I got a bit sick was when I had a big bowl of yogurt before running. I think the dairy got to me.
Kate
May 7, 2009 at 6:58 pmHey Jenna,
How do you make your wraps so tight? Every time I make one it falls apart. I’m impressed, yours look like the ones at the deli.
Good luck with your next run. You’ll do great!
David
May 7, 2009 at 9:33 pmI can’t eat a thing. No matter what time I have free to run, I have to wait to eat until after that. I get so uncomfortable. It happens. Just keep at it. I’ve gotten lost running twice this week, so I have had to do more endurance than I wanted to do. At least you didn’t get lost.
elise
May 8, 2009 at 11:30 amugh. ive totally been there before. lets just say i know where ALL the bathrooms are in central park.
take care of yourself girly, you know your bro would want to you be healthy and in times of stress and sorrow, we tend to forget to put ourselves first.
Lindsay
May 11, 2009 at 5:38 pmmmm that wrap looks sooo yummy! i must try that brand sometime!